Most often I am asked how long I have been a vegan. My response is always the same - not very long, six months or so… but I began my adventure into vegetarianism when I was four. I love telling this story as it reminds me of how outspoken, and curious I was as a young child. After eating a hamburger I asked my mom where hamburgers came from and of course she told me to which I exclaimed “Oh mommy no!” You can imagine after learning that my body was consuming part of an animal I never did eat meat again.
I’ve always been struck by the idea of making a choice and following through on it. When I decided to become a Vegan many factors came into play. I’ve spent most of my life being sick, in and out of doctors offices and hospitals from the time I was born. I was born premature, and although I was only three pounds the nurses had to apply bandages to my knees after I decided to push myself along. Since then I’ve fought through health crisis, after health crisis. I was diagnosed with lupus when I was twenty-one after having symptoms from the time I was ten. For years I’d become accustom to being in pain, and even thought that was the norm for everyone. On top of that I also have raynauds disease, PCOS, and PMDD. It certainly isn’t a healthy regime of antidotes for a happy, and fulfilled life.
After experiencing immense, and intense pain for several nights I headed to the hospital where I was treated quite badly. What doctors, and nurses in the ER fail to understand about lupus is that I wouldn’t complain unless I felt there was something wrong. I constantly battle between levels of pain, what one may feel when they cut their finger is most likely less than what I feel internally on a daily basis. The only way I’ve ever been able to make sense of it to other people is to tell them that it feels as if someone is ripping my flesh and bones from the inside out and then compressing them. I was curled up in a hospital bed crying hysterically, trying to work in a comfortable position when I suddenly had a flash back of being sixteen in the same position. I had an ovarian cyst. I was sure this wouldn’t happen again even though I’d been to several doctors prior to this visit attesting to the fact that something was wrong with me. I even walked out on a doctor who patted his blackberry while I talked to him. The cyst popped slightly while I was getting a sonogram which I must mentioned happen as well when I was sixteen. This is by far one of the most unpleasant kind of pains to experience, and afterward with talk of having surgery to remove the rest of the cyst I decided to take matters into my own hands.
I had no idea how. I felt quite lost, and haunted by my inadequate medical care and the pain I had felt at the hospital. It wasn’t until I struck up a conversation with a lovely hair stylist at a photo shoot did an idea come to me - stop eating dairy. The hairstylist who I wish I had kept in contact with after this meeting handed me Detox for Women by Natalia Rose to read while she played with my hair. Although this book certainly isn’t strictly a book about veganism - in fact fish and dairy are featured I chose to pay attention to what she had to say about chronic disease and PCOS. It became even clearer to me that if I wanted to feel healthy I would have to give up some of those quiet comforts that I so often enjoyed but were possibly making me sicker. Since then I have found that I feel much healthier, and have more energy to live a happier existence. I would have never thought that being a vegan would bring me so much happiness but it truly has. I enjoy food more than I ever have, and in the process no longer feel guilt over eating dairy products that could be bringing animals pain or discomfort.
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